Are you the type of person who has always trusted yourself? Then this is not the article for you. I am here to speak to those like myself, those people who gave their power away and trusted everyone BUT themselves. Those of us that thought everyone else’s opinions were better than their own.

For many years I was a victim. I placed myself in situations where others controlled my life. I felt I always made bad decisions and so I stopped making them. I would ask at least 3, if not more people what I should do and then I would pick the one that sounded best.

In 1991 I began to step into my power and went back to school. This was not easy. As a single mother of 3 trying to manage was incredibly difficult, but I did it. Something inside of me was crying out to be heard, and although I did not know it at the time, this was the beginning of my spiritual awakening.
I read books on positive affirmations, and made new choices in the way I thought about myself, I did a lot of writing. I even burned some of it not knowing at the time it was a shamanic tool for release. I began to feel better, but I still did not trust my decision making process. No one had ever talked to me about my intuition or how to access it.

In 2006, my whole world changed. As I entered the world of Shamanism I found I was a feeler healer, as I know many of us are. Learning how to trust my intuition became a daily practice. I would make decisions based on how I felt. If I was wrong, I would not beat myself up, I would simply say, “That was a lesson”. Each lesson helped me to gain a better understanding of myself and how I worked.

I began treating myself like my own best friend. I spoke kindly about myself and to myself, and became hyper aware of my thoughts, words and actions. I became totally honest with everyone around me, most of all myself.
Once you become totally honest with yourself and take inventory of your life you can look around and see what is no longer working for you. In today’s world there are so many choices, and so much technology, we are getting further and further way from whom we really are.

Find yourself in the moment and ask yourself what truly makes you happy. Is it the new gadget, app, bigger house, or car? Are you looking outside of yourself to find happiness?

We can only truly be happy when we go inside ourselves and look around. Take a moment and breathe. Listen to your mind. What is the one thing you worry about the most? This is the thing you are giving your power away to. Stop giving it power. Breathe and shift your consciousness. Only you have the power to change your mind. The moment you decided to trust yourself, and become more conscious in your everyday living, the happier you will become.

Take stock of your life and how you want to live it. Clear out the clutter and get back to the basics. YOU are the most important person… YES you! You are the only one who can provide yourself with the comfort and care you deserve.

Once we start being kind to ourselves our intuition grows and we make decisions based on what’s best for us.
Make a commitment to yourself. Write a contract to be more loving, honest and compassionate with yourself. Those around you may have a hard time with the new you, but the real friends will stay around and admire your personal growth.

Trusting ourselves and teaching our children to do the same will grow a generation of leaders and our world will be a better place to live.

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Shaman Isabella Stoloff founded the Orange County Healing Center. She has a full time practice and travels all over the world teaching and leading ceremony.